Traversing Turbulent Times
May 19, 2012 4:20 pmFrom the Szenabling file:
I remember a day a long time ago when my father came home from work in the middle of the day. I was getting ready to go to my baseball game and thought it was great that dad could maybe see the game. He always worked on Saturdays for as long as I could remember and never got the chance to see me play. I asked him if he could go to watch the game and he responded by saying that he had lost his job. As I stood there watching, I saw just how upset he was, although I was way too young to appreciate what it meant to a family man to lose a large part of what defined him. He sat down in the kitchen in a slump of silence. A few minutes later I was running out the door and told dad where I was playing if he felt like catching the game. No response.
The memory of that moment remains clear to me and I often remember the feeling of not knowing what to do or say. There was no one else home, mom was working and in hindsight I always thought that I should have stayed around. I had never seen him so down. It wasn’t his nature. I knew that he wasn’t always the most optimistic person but he was never as defeated as he seemed to be that day. Later on the same day, I discovered an important life lesson, which today seems like an important and relevant insight to share.
I don’t know about you, but the recession recoil and tough times we face seem to be penetrating every life I know. It may not be affecting you directly, but the ramifications of such a profound uncertainty of an economic nadir are scary. People all know someone that is experiencing a down-sizing or shift in their security blanket. Everyone is impacted and included in the still unfolding scenario of lost investments, income and confidence. It’s hard to be “up” when so many are “down”. It has become a contagious, cynical cycle that has everyone talking, digging in, and praying.
I realize that every situation is different and I don’t pretend to know what you may be experiencing right now. Hopefully everything and everyone in your circle is okay. I don’t have a magic-wand answer for what is a one-of-a–kind unraveling of the world we knew, at least in economic terms. I won’t go into my opinion, but I have heard so many opinions and reactions that suffice it to say, nobody really knows what to do and everyone is afraid to do the wrong thing. That puts us collectively in the state of neutral. Idling, wanting and waiting to step on the gas and get going, but unclear of the journey ahead. About the only comforting aspect is that we’re not alone but that fact doesn’t make it any easier to share our troubles; pride after all is the last bastion of human frailty. We need to keep up a good image and that holds us back from appearing weak or lost or vulnerable. Pride, however in the face of pink slip psychosis, is very difficult to maintain and so we retreat.
When we disconnect from the outside because the inside hurts, we generate a coldness. This coldness is reflected in unreturned emails or telephone calls and lack of eye-contact to friends. The pain and the fear make us want to hide and recoil. We seek respite in our own thoughts and imagination and therein lies the trap: We create insular and isolated worlds that promise peace but never deliver. The key to getting through turbulent times is to remember that you can’t ignore it or avoid it. I think what will help most is a simple mantra that reminds us that relationships trump bad times and our families need us present:
STAY ENGAGED / DON’T RETREAT – You never know the power you have to change a life by simply showing up, just like my dad did by coming to my game on that Saturday long ago when I knew that he did it just for me.
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Today’s Szenippet: Life can deal up some pretty amazing situations that are not only unplanned, but unpredictable. However, once whatever happens happens, it becomes a reality whether we like it or not. That’s why we all have the gift of “choice”; it’s what determines what happens next.



